Boy oh boy.  What a day it has been.  I found out things with my therapist  - I realized my Dad was still trying to discourage me from focusing on music (but from my subconscious - he's been gone over 12 years now).  I still have a cold.  Got to love it.  Here's today's entry. 
All these things were said at different times, some of them were said four or five in a row.  This conversation encompassed decades.  These are both actual questions my Dad asked me and statements he made, and paraphrasing of others.  Amazing.   But I loved him then, and I love him as a memory.  He meant well.    C

            What my DAD SAID about my having a career in music (and what I should have answered)                                                                   3-14-13

There are a million kids out there trying to make it..

Yes, but that doesn’t mean it’s a bad idea.

Your chances are a million to one.

No, either I make it or I don’t: that’s a 50/50 chance - much better odds.

What makes you think you’ll succeed when so many fail?

Because I have studied hard, have something to say, and practice a lot. I will work at it until I succeed.  It is what I am best at.

You should be practical, fit in (instead of doing what you love).

Well, you did that, how does it feel?  You don’t seem happy to me.

Why do you have to sing like a colored man?

Because they devised the blues, and it’s part of the style.

I don’t want you embarrassing us all.

Would you like me to become a great success and make you all proud?

Why don’t you just do what everyone else does?

You mean why don’t I go into business, or be a merchant?

Because I am especially talented in music, and I do what everyone else in my field does.  They stay up late, they are haunted by their music, and it’s the center of their world.

What, have you got “something to say”?

Yes, Dad, I do.  I really have a lot to say.  And no one else is saying it.

The World is not waiting for your sunrise!

Yes, Dad, they are.  They need my songs and ideas.